Breathe: The Diary of Julie Gaffney
by PrincessH
Summary: .:.Revised & Complete.:. One shot based on "Breathe" by Anna Nalick. A day in the life of Julie Gaffney. JA CG PLZ R


**Disclaimer: ****I don't own the Mighty Ducks or have any affiliation with them. This story is intended for entertainment purposes only. I own the plot and any original characters. I also do not owe the song "Breathe" by Anna Nalik, the credit belongs to her. Enjoy;)**

_2 Am and she calls me cause I'm still awake_

_Can you help me unravel my latest mistake?_

_I don't love him and winter just wasn't my season._

The phone next to the bed rang out in the dead silence of the night causing the blonde laying next to it to turn her head towards the sound. The only noise that had previously been occupying her thoughts had been the ticking of the bed side clock and the repeat pattern of breath against her pale skin from the other occupant. The sudden noise had startled her fleeting thoughts into reality.

'Who is that?' Julie Gaffney thought, taking a glance at the clock. 2am, she mused, rolling onto her side to answer it. The arm that had been draped over her stomach fell to the soft covers and woke the sandy haired man next to her for only a moment. He didn't make a noise but rolled away from the ringing, tucking his head further into the pillow. Julie hadn't been sleeping anyway but rather staring at the night moon that splashed in the window and illuminated the small apartment with its light. It set a glow to the entire room and the shadows it made danced on the wall, keeping her tired mind occupied.

"Hello?" She almost mumbled, picking up the receiver and holding it to her ear. She hoped it was nothing serious. The line was dead for a long time before she heard a soft whimper that broke into a sob.

"Jules..." The voice sounded a million miles away but Julie would know the voice anywhere. What could she need at this hour?

"Connie, what's going on?" Julie's voice tried to convey the compassion she felt for the girl on the other end of the line. They had been friends for many years. Immediate fear rushed into Julie's voice with each whimper breathed into the phone that left her question unanswered. She was about to say something else when Connie's small voice filled the silence again.

"I've made a big mistake..." She cried into the reciever, trying to muffle the sound with her hand. Julie's chest tightened as the weak cries came back on the line. The bed shifted behind her and an arm came around her waist, pulling her against his strong chest. He always knew when something was wrong. His other hand found her back and began to rub small soothing circles to keep her calm.

"What's going on?" His husky voice breathed into her ear as he continued to comfort her. She felt bad for waking him and motioned she was find before she pulled away, swinging her legs off the bed to move away from his welcoming embrace and into the living room.

"What's the matter?" She asked again, entering the other room and turning on the first lamp she came to. Connie's voice cracked under the pressure once again and she fought to form a sentence that would make sense to her friend. Steeling her emotions, Connie took a deep breath and whispered the hardest response she'd ever given.

"I'm pregnant." The words echoed in Julie's head as Connie sobbed into the receiver once more. Julie covered her mouth with her free hand, a slight panic running down her spine. She'd know Connie hadn't been right in months since her last and final break up with the only man she'd ever loved but she thought Connie would have taken precautions to avoid a mess like the one she was currently in. He had rose from the bed behind her to grab his shirt before heading into the kitchen for a glass of water. He grabbed a second glass knowing she was need one too after her call was over. Julie sat stone faced on the couch, her chest heavy and her voice hard to find. She really did not know what the right words were to comfort her friend. Julie Gaffney with her perfect SAT score was at a loss for words as to what she could possibly say to make this situation better in her friends mind.

"Connie, I..." She started, struggling to find the right approach. Lucky for her Connie had more to say and cut her off before she had a chance to say the wrong thing.

"It was a mistake..." Connie's voice pleaded. "I don't love him anymore, I swear." She tried to convince herself more than Julie. Julie's heart broke as her mind wrapped around the full story of exactly what Connie was saying.

"Is it his?" She asked now extremely confused at the situation that had awoken her in the middle of the night. As far as she had know they hadn't been together in months. They last time she'd seen him was at their yearly reunion where he drank himself into a coma and puked on Charlie when he tried to get him to go home.

"Yes, it was a onetime thing..." She tried to explain. "A goodbye...anything but love..." She promised sobbing lightly into the receiver to try to explain her actions. "I don't love him... I don't..." She repeated over and over again. Julie knew the truth but she would never call her out over it. She needed her right now. Julie took a heavy breathe before speaking.

"Everything will be alright. What are you going to do, you're going to tell him, right?" Julie reasoned, rubbing her eyes as a comforting hand placed itself on her shoulder and handed her a glass of water, rubbing her exposed skin lightly. She took the glass and set it on the table before she moved her hand to his and patted his fingers reassuringly. She was lucky to have him, she thanked her stars every day they were together.

"No. I can't. That part of my life is over. No more Connie and Guy. Guy and Connie. Any way you want to put it, it's over." Connie stated with venom in her voice. Julie hadn't intended on making her angry. The line was silent for a long moment as Connie fumed on the other end. She sighed heavily before her voice sounded again, this time more reasonable. "I've made an appointment in the morning...Jules, I need you to come with me." She asked softly, almost scared at what the response would be. Julie's blood froze in her veins at the realization of what was to come in just a few short hours. It wasn't her decision to make but god, if she didn't think Connie was making a mistake. For as long as she could remember Connie and Guy had been together, she was willing to forever change that relationship just to prove a point that she was over him.

"Connie, are you sure?" She asked, knowing that went against all her morals but she would do whatever Connie asked of her. She was her friend, through everything. It didn't mean, she didn't think was making a mistake but she had to let her make it and deal with the consequences.

"No." Connie whimpered again, muffling a sob by holding the phone against her chest instead of her mouth. Julie sighed deeply, listening to Connie fall apart on the other end of the line. She was her friend, her best friend. She couldn't leave her alone to do this. Julie would put aside all her morals if it meant that Connie would stop crying.

"What time?" Julie asked closing her eyes to sound more supportive than she felt at the moment.

"Noon..." Connie almost breathed a sigh of relief that she wouldn't have to do this alone.

"Okay. I'll be there." She stated, tightening her lips to her teeth before she heard a click on the other end and she too hung up the phone. He stared down at her with his blue eyes showing sympathy for how she felt before she stood to meet him. She wanted to cry for her friend, she want to cry for the situation. He glided her quickly back to the bedroom and sat her on the edge before taking the phone from her hands.

"Are you okay?" He slowly knelt in front of her and rubbed her knee with his thumb the way he always did to make her feel better. Julie shook her head no as he laid her back down into their bed. She began to feel tears fall down her flushed cheeks the moment her head hit the pillow and he was there in a moment, wrapping his arms around her waist.

"Shh. You don't need to tell me what's going on." He whispered smoothing her hair against her head and placing soft kisses on it. "I love you, Julie." He whispered into her ear, holding her close.

"I love you, too." She whispered back before drifting back to sleep, his soothing words in her ear and her chest aching with regret.

_We walk through the doors so accusing their eyes_

_Like they have any right at all to criticize_

_Hypocrites you're all here for the very same reason._

Julie woke up the next morning, feeling like a rock had been dropped right onto her chest where her heart should have been. Her eyes refused to open to the morning light and she laid there for a few minutes longer softly sobbing to herself. Connie stood on the sidewalk outside her old apartment building when Julie pulled up to let her in. The air was cold that morning and Connie immediately turned up the heat on the dashboard, blowing hot air into her hands.

"Are you okay?" Julie asked not wanting to offend her. She looked ahead with a brave face. Her eyes were red and swollen; no doubt she didn't sleep the night before but she held her composure. Shifting the car into gear, Julie headed on the way, not saying a word to each other the entire way. it was almost easier to pretend if they didn't talk about it Julie's mind wanted to stay in the car when they arrived before she slowly stepped out, following her best friend through the door of the small building. Women already seated looked up at them as they entered and their eyes filled with hate. Hate for being there, hate for making the choice that this place would bring. Maybe it was hate for themselves. Julie turned away, watching only Connie as she told the receptionist her name and her appointment time. She was handed a clipboard and turned back to Julie. They sat down to fill out the forms allowing Julie's eyes to wander around again and then at the floor, feeling like she could be sick.

"Connie." She started, knowing she shouldn't push but she didn't think she could do this. Connie let the pen drop from the paper and slide to the floor. Deep down she knew she wouldn't be able to do it either Julie placed her hand over Connie's, stopping her from retrieving the pen. She sighed as if relieved but didn't look up.

"You have to be sure before you do this. You may not be able to live with this decision later." Julie promised. Connie still had not looked up instead her eyes welled up in fresh tears and began to send silent streaks down her cheeks. Finally meeting her friend's eyes, Connie silently told Julie what she wanted to do.

"Come on." She said putting the paper down on the coffee table and wrapping an arm around her to walk out of the clinic.

_Cause you can't jump the track_

_We're like cars on a cable and life's like an hourglass glued to the table,_

_No one can find the rewind button girl_

_So just cradle your head in your hands._

_And breathe, just breathe, whoa breathe, just breathe_

_May he turned 21 on the base of Fort Bliss_

_Just today he sat down to the flask in his fist_

_Ain't been sober since maybe October of last year_

He sat on his couch with a glass of brown liquid in his hand when they entered the front door. He didn't bother to look up, just stared at the television almost in a trance. It didn't matter who came to visit him anymore, his life wasn't worth living. It was deep into winter as the cold air followed them up into the apartment building from the bottom door that was constantly left open. So much for the heating bill, not that it was the nicest apartment in the neighborhood but the occupants still should be warm, Julie thought, wrapping an arm around herself. He hadn't been working much lately and the bills were piling high on the counter that used to be theirs. Connie's eyes fell on his hand and her face reddened with anger.

"I have to talk to you." She breathed heavily, not wanting to talk to the angry drunk he had become.

"What do you want?" He asked, a little bitter, a lace of resentment in his voice. He hadn't been the same since he and Connie broke up in October. Different bars every night, sometimes different girls. Anything to make him forget her. Connie's eyes feel again to the glass and she wondered what had she turned him into.

"How much have you had to drink today?" Julie asked to defuse the situation. She scooped up the glass away from him and took it to the kitchen. He sighed with annoyance at her, reaching for the full bottle on the table in front of him. Who needed a glass anyway... He silently thought.

"Look, if you came here to be my Mother, Julie..." He started resting the bottle between his hands before Connie sat down on the other side of him. His eyes fell to her and he looked confused when she reached out for him. His glassy eyes looked her over, wondering what she was going to say before she opened her mouth. More lies, another night together before she left in the morning promising she'd be back in an hour. He could ring her neck if he wasn't so drunk. It was easier in this state to let her use him. He'd just drink away whatever pain she came to inflict today.

"Please." She said as he quieted the ongoing to train in his head. He was almost shocked that she was in the same room as him since the last time they had seen each other. He didn't say anything. She sighed, taking his hand in hers and placing it on her stomach. She really didn't know how to tell him or if this would even work but she had to try. Julie stepped out of the room to give them a moment and dumped the glass of rum down the sink. They're voices filled the air from the other room but Julie tried not to listen. it was only her concern if they started arguing.

"I'm having a baby..." Connie whispered softly, looking down at their hands on her flat stomach, as there was a dead silence for a few long seconds. Julie glanced out in the living room before she started a pot of coffee in the kitchen to sober him up.

"So what?" He thought pulling his hand away. Did she come here to gloat that she was having another man's kid. She could keep that to herself. Connie's eyes looked down.

"It's yours..." She whispered almost too soft for him to hear. His eyes met hers for the first time months without hostility.

_Here in town you can tell he's been down for while_

_But my God it's so beautiful when the boy smiles_

_Wanna hold him but maybe I'll just sing about it_

Just when Julie thought they'd killed each other, there was a great roar of laughter and his voice, sounding more sober than it had been in a while.

"Are you sure?" He asked excitement in his voice as he replaced his hand on her stomach.

"Yes..." She said through a smile of bright white teeth. Julie smiled too as they began to kiss and whisper promises to each other.

"I'm going to marry you, Connie Moreau. Just like I said i would when we were twelve years old." He promised, kissing her face. She laughed, wrapping her arms around him to hold on for dear life.

"I love you, Connie." He said kissing her face again and again.

"I love you, Guy." She whispered as Julie slipped out the back door to leave them to their celebration.

_Cause you can't jump the track_

_We're like cars on a cable_

_And life's like an hourglass glued to the table,_

_No one can find the rewind button boys so cradle your head in your hands_

_And breathe, just breathe, whoa breathe, just breathe_

_There's a light at the end of this tunnel you shout cause you're just as far in as you'll ever be out_

_And these mistakes you've made_

_You'll just make them again if you'll only try turnin' around_

Julie returned home to a dimly lit apartment. He had planned something for her with rose petals on the floor leading to the bedroom. She smiled at a note that lay on her pillow, written in his handwriting when she got there.

"I'm in the kitchen." Was all it said. She smiled again, taking off her heavy jacket and following the trail into the kitchen where he stood with a bottle of champagne and red roses in his hand. A smile crossed her face,

"How did you know?" She asked, stepping closer to him to receive the first of many kisses for the night.

"I'd do anything to make you smile, last night you were so upset, I knew I needed to make you feel better. Why does it have to be a special occasion?" He asked leaning down to press his lips to hers again.

"Thank you." Was all she said as he put down the stuff in his hands and wrapped his arms around her in a gentle embrace.

"Just remember, one day at a time. As long as we're together everything will work out." He promised, swaying with her in their kitchen. She smiled,

"We'll get though it as long as we're together." She repeated to him, closing her eyes to his gentle touch.

"I love you Jules." He said smiling against her soft ear.

"I love you too, Adam." She whispered back.

_2Am and I'm still awake writing this song_

_If I get it all down on paper it's no longer inside of me threaten' the life it belongs to._

_And I feel like I'm naked in front of the crowd_

_Cause these words are my diary screamin' out aloud_

_And I know that you'll use them however you want to._

She sat up that night, writing in her diary and smiled as she finished her thoughts for the day. Life seemed right again, Guy and Connie back together and life would go on with a new addition to their family. She glanced at the clock as she climbed in next to him and wrapped her arms around his waist before falling fast asleep.

_Just breathe, ohho breathe_


End file.
